Written yesterday, during an anxiety attack. Hey - I complete the writer trifecta, apparently, and at least I'm not ashamed of this one.
i.
it's 4am and you're tired
your eyes are heavy, but you're scared
the monsters are loud tonight
you feel their claws scraping at you
you hear their teeth in your ear
your heart is heavy, and you know
you're dying for a little rest tonight
ii.
it's 5:30am and your vision is blurry
you almost hit a divider, and you don't care
you're going 130 km/h and
you wish you could die, almost
you're so uncomfortable in your own skin
you want to tear it off
you want to rest
iii.
it's 7am and you're in his bed
you want him to say the words
you're terrified that he doesn't want you
you know he doesn't need you
but being needed means you have a purpose
he doesn't say it, you don't ask
sleep doesn't come easy
iv.
it's 11:20am and you're awake
your eyes jolt open at the sound of people
talking, walking outside the door
you just want to go back to sleep
he's warm and he's next to you
you close your eyes and bury your face in the pillows
you don't dream
v.
it's noon and you wake up
he's on the phone and his voice is soft
he never sounds like that with you
and all you can think about is how
you're just a replacement and
you're not important because he says he'll be there in half an hour
so you get up, and you shut down
i.
it's 4am and you're tired
your eyes are heavy, but you're scared
the monsters are loud tonight
you feel their claws scraping at you
you hear their teeth in your ear
your heart is heavy, and you know
you're dying for a little rest tonight
ii.
it's 5:30am and your vision is blurry
you almost hit a divider, and you don't care
you're going 130 km/h and
you wish you could die, almost
you're so uncomfortable in your own skin
you want to tear it off
you want to rest
iii.
it's 7am and you're in his bed
you want him to say the words
you're terrified that he doesn't want you
you know he doesn't need you
but being needed means you have a purpose
he doesn't say it, you don't ask
sleep doesn't come easy
iv.
it's 11:20am and you're awake
your eyes jolt open at the sound of people
talking, walking outside the door
you just want to go back to sleep
he's warm and he's next to you
you close your eyes and bury your face in the pillows
you don't dream
v.
it's noon and you wake up
he's on the phone and his voice is soft
he never sounds like that with you
and all you can think about is how
you're just a replacement and
you're not important because he says he'll be there in half an hour
so you get up, and you shut down